For thousands of years, philosophies and religions have come and gone to help people become their best selves. In recent decades, advanced psychological studies have shown that humans do not stop growing psychologically after reaching adulthood. Some call it gaining life experience, and others call it maturing. What does that mean?

As humans, we are inherently designed to create meaning. We constantly strive to actualize our multifaceted intellectual abilities and forge deep connections with others. These two needs are intertwined. As we nurture our intellectual and psychological growth, we find ourselves more fulfilled and our lives imbued with deeper meaning.

Our ability to make meaning is deeply rooted in our perception of the world, or in other words, our level of maturity. In the realm of modern psychology, this is referred to as human development. It’s a term that encompasses our individual interpretation of reality. How distorted is our view of the world, and which past experiences shape our perception, influencing our understanding of the present moment?

Reflecting on our view of the present moment requires the practice of self-awareness. However, this is not a solo journey. We need a circle of people whom we trust. A life coach is a supportive facilitator who helps you see and hear yourself through deep listening, compassion, and thought-provoking questions. They can help you identify growth opportunities and provide a roadmap for your personal development. Whether it’s improving communication, time management, stress management, navigating life transitions, or enhancing learning skills, a life coach can add light to your journey.

There are countless elements in human life that can serve as pillars of our growth. Wise empathy, reflection, sense of identity, responsibility-taking, conflict analysis, perspective-taking, recognizing internal and external motivations, critical thinking, and resilience are just a few examples. But how can we deepen our understanding and use of these elements? How do we navigate these questions in our own lives?

• How much do I know myself? What do I think of myself? How do others seem to know me?
• How has my value system changed over the years? Do I still value the same things I did ten years ago? Where do I see myself in 10 years from now?
• Do I know my emotions and their triggers?
• How much do I know about my beliefs and their source? How can I see my hidden beliefs?
• How do I budget my time every day?
• How do I budget my energy every day?
• What is causing my stress or confusion right now? Is it an outside trigger that hits the inside button?
• How do I approach someone rude to me? How about abusive people? Or those with no point of view to contribute?
• Where can I say no, and where is the right place to be more accommodating?
• Am I feeling overwhelmed because I am taking too much responsibility? How can I strike a balance?
• How is my relationship with power? How do I define power in my life?
• What tools am I using to ensure that I consider all factors and variables that can impact a critical decision?
• Am I feeling stuck in a conflict? Do I have to take a side in dealing with it? Is there more than one solution? What are the opposite poles that are fighting here?
• How far does the impact of my actions and decisions go? Who needs to be safe in my world?

We humans usually have two choices: survive or survive and thrive. There are life situations in which we need to focus only on survival, but many occasions in life offer the opportunity to thrive, grow, and mature.

Through recent research studies and a modern understanding of the human psyche, positive psychology and cognitive science teach us that there are always more profound levels of awareness and growth. To learn where we are and what steps we can take to deepen our connection with life and feel more fulfilled, a life coach – using the human development models and theories – can compassionately hold a space for us to see our growth opportunities. These human development theories are based on years of research from thinkers, philosophers, and psychologists such as Martin Heidegger, Erich Fromm, Ken Wilber, Robert Kegan, Susan Cook-Greuter, William Torbert, and many others. As adults, we go through metamorphosis phases of life, very much like a butterfly. Do we want to get stuck in the earlier phase and feel tired and stressed by the complex life, or would it be better to grow to later stages of development where we can fly and observe life from the top, and when we fall, we can trust our wings to fly again?

Shabnam Curtis